22

I really should've done this yesterday but God had other plans, ranging from violent hayfever to mindless procrastination. Anyway, the fact that this is a day late means that the original genius idea of such a premise is gone, so if you could just imagine that today is actually yesterday we can get through this much smoother. Cheers.

Woo, yay, and other such words signifying jubilance. Today is most definitely the twenty-second of June, and this particular twenty-second of June marks the point at which I have completed the twenty-second year of my existence (not including the nine months I spent in a state of gestation), meaning I no longer can claim to be full of youth and opportunity at the age of twenty-one and must finally succumb to the harsh realities of the harsh real world by taking my title as a twenty-two year old. In honour of such a momentous event, here are twenty-two facts about the number twenty-two. Why? Because it seemed like such a good idea at the time yesterday.

1) Twenty-two is a number consisting of two twos.

2) Twenty-two in bingo is commonly referred to as "two little ducks". This is commonly met with an audience response of "quack quack".

3) Twenty-two is the number of boxes in a game of popular televisual mind-numbing, zombie making-fest Deal Or No Deal.

4) Furthermore, box number twenty-two in the aforementioned televised science experiment is superstitiously referred to as the "death box" in some kind of ritualistic occult manner.

5) Twenty-two in German ist zweiundzwanzig.

6) Twenty-two, according to the folks of Ancient Rome, is XXII.

7) Twenty-two divided by seven is nearly π (or "pi" if you can't read Greek).

8) Twenty-two is the atomic number of titanium.

9) The Hebrew Alphabet contains twenty-two letters.

10) 22 in binary is 10110.

11) Twenty-two is two times eleven.

12) There are twenty-two Major Arcana cards in a standard Tarot deck, numbered 0-21 (for some reason).

13) Twenty-two is the number of players on the pitch in a game of football at any one time (or if you're American, "soccer").

14) According to novelist Joseph Heller, "Catch-22" is the name of a paradox in which a situation cannot be resolved until the resolution of the situation is achieved in the first place... or something mind-fucky like that.

15) The twenty-second letter of the alphabet is V, unless you're Welsh, in which case it's RH.

16) The year 22 began on a Thursday.

17)  "22" is the title of a song by Lily Allen about being 'nearly thirty now'.

18) Twenty-two is the amount of minutes so far I've spent trawling the Internet looking for obscure facts about the number twenty-two.

19) Twenty-two is a less common answer to the popularly customised joke 'How many (insert type of people here) does it take to screw in a lightbulb'.

20) Alabama was the twenty-second state of the United States of America.

21) Twenty-two is the number of bones which make up the human head.

22) Twenty-two is the number of pointless things I've just typed out and you've just read... which is impressive considering I normally talk a lot more random shite than this.